Trainwreck
by RockDiva
Summary: Alice has returned to Underland only to learn that the Oraculum foretells something unsettling regarding Tarrant's fate. Will she be able to save him from himself or will his madness destroy him forever? H/A
1. Falling Like I've Never Fell Before

**Author's Note:** Sorry for spamming anyone who has me on author alert, but I couldn't wait to post this, lol! This is the first _full length,_ post-movie story idea I've had for AiW and I've been working on it for a while now before actually posting. The story is loosely based on my favorite song _Trainwreck _by Demi Lovato.

_Pairings & Warnings: _Possibly going to be a little on the dark side later on in the story since this is about the madness that stands between Alice and Tarrant_. _Thus it is Hatter/Alice._  
_

_Disclaimer: _By now everyone should know that anyone posting on FFN probably doesn't own anything they are writing about. I don't even claim to know if this plot, any of the specific details, etc. have already been used somewhere in this vast section as I haven't read everything. So, my apologies if you feel I have stolen something from you. I promise it was unintentional! I do not own rights to the song, _Trainwreck _or any of its lyrics which are used as some titles and/or alluded to within the text of this story.

**Chapter 1**

_**Falling Like I've Never Fell Before**_

The sky wasn't overcast anymore, the clearing had brightened significantly, Time was still ticking for him, and his dearest friends were able to laugh and throw things with reckless abandon, but the chair beside Tarrant was still empty and so he could enjoy none of it. Every moment that passed made his reason falter a little bit more. Tarrant was beginning to remember why he had taken to killing Time in the first place. It wasn't so much the insufferable wait as it was the insufferable awareness of each moment passing by never to be gotten back.

However, Tarrant had determined not to go killing Time again. She had told him she would be back before he knew it and he wanted to prove he believed her. Of course, the longer it took, the harder it was to keep a sane outlook on the situation. Doubt was beginning to creep in and take hold once again and this alone made him even angrier because on the one hand he didn't want to doubt her (although some doubt had been there from the moment he'd told her she wouldn't remember him) and on the other hand he was afraid he would never see her again.

Mally turned her head to look at her friend just in time to see the color of his eyes change from green to yellow. She quickly scurried down the length of the three tables until she reached him. "Hatter, you have to stop thinking about her." The feisty little dormouse betrayed her tender side, the side of her that hated to see Tarrant suffering and also hated that it was because he was pining for someone she could never be.

"I can't, Mally," Tarrant shook his head, regretting just a little that he couldn't be a better friend to her. "I'll never be able to stop thinking about her."

Mally thought a moment, not yet giving up. She decided to try a different approach. "She said she'd be back didn't she? Don't be so impatient, Hatta'. She'd at least want you to enjoy yourself in the meantime." Mally scurried back to her seat, pretending to be indifferent towards the subject.

All the while Thackery was watching on as he shook from the anxiety this solemn mood caused him. "T-t-tea," Thackery held up his cup with a shaky hand.

Tarrant sighed very loudly before nodding his head. "You're right. Alice would want…" Suddenly, his expression changed again. It was so curious, not even Mally could be certain what had come over him as she hadn't seen it before. It didn't seem like madness. "Alice?"

Mally turned to look towards the woods, Thackery following her lead, but there was nothing or no one there. She then turned her attention back towards the Hatter as he stood to his feet so quickly that his chair toppled over behind him. Perhaps it was a fit of madness after all. "Hatta'!" Mally called out, hoping to stop him, but it had no effect.

Instead, Tarrant took off running as fast as he could into the woods, leaving his confused and anxious friends behind him. "Where is he going?" Thackery asked Mally simply, any trace of anxiety gone as though nothing strange had just happened.

"I don't know," Mally stared into the woods, the blur of Tarrant's orange hair now completely gone from sight. "But I mean to find out." With that, Mally leaped from the table and hurried into the woods after their mad friend.

Thackery looked around, ears twitching for several moments before they stopped and his eyes widened. "Alone at last," he said as he reached out and picked up a spoon and held it at arm's length.

Mally was alone as well, no sign of Tarrant anywhere. She had never realized Tarrant could be so quick on his feet. Or, at least, she thought she was alone. "What has gotten into Tarrant?" The Chesire Cat's head appeared as the little mouse wandered aimlessly through the forest, wondering which direction her friend had gone.

"Chess!" she squeaked angrily at him. She despised the fact that he always showed up when least expected. _Just like a feline_, she thought in annoyance before realizing he had mentioned Tarrant. "Wait, have you seen him then?"

"Seen him?" Chessur's full body finally emerged and he looked at her with less of a smirk than he normally would. He seemed genuinely curious about what was going on. "I barely had time to evaporate. He came charging through here like an angry Bandersnatch."

"Well, did you see which direction he went or didn't you?" Mally couldn't care less if Chessur had nearly gotten pummeled by Tarrant. All she cared about at the moment was figuring out how to find Tarrant before he did any real damage in his peculiar state.

"Perhaps," Chess said lazily as his playful nature returned. "But I see no reason why I should tell you."

"How about if I stick your eye out?" Mally put a hand on her tiny, makeshift sword.

"Hardly an incentive," Chessur answered before evaporating.

Mally walked on stubbornly for a few moments before realizing she desperately needed to find a way to get the cat to tell her which direction she should go. "Listen, Chess, if you can hear me," she was almost certain he was still floating around somewhere nearby. "I really need to find Hatter. I don't know what's come over him. He just rushed off from the tea party without so much as another word, but Alice."

"Alice?" Chessur reappeared all at once. "Well, that changes things then doesn't it?" He eyed her carefully, not sure what to make of the situation. If Tarrant's mind was suddenly bent on Alice, Chess knew there was no telling what might happen.

"Now you see why I have to catch him," Mally looked at him impatiently.

Chessur was about to tell her what he knew when McTwisp came bounding through the woods in a very frantic manner. Chess couldn't hold back a laugh as Mally was now the one nearly pummeled. "I'm late! Dreadfully late!" Nivens exclaimed. There would be no stopping the white rabbit at the speed he moved.

Mally found her footing again and looked at the Chesire Cat. "Clearly, we are missing something very important." Chessur disappeared before reappearing several yards ahead. "I don't know about you, but I would like to find out."

"What do you think I've been trying to do!" Mally snapped angrily before running to catch up with him.

* * *

After running for miles, only stopping every now and then very briefly, Tarrant finally slowed down to a brisk walk in order to steady his bearings. His feet somehow knew the path they wanted, no, _needed_ to take, but they had not bothered giving him any warning and now he was ready to figure out where he was. Tarrant looked around curiously as he couldn't recall the last time he had been this far past the Underland crossing, at least on this particular path. As he moved a little further, he thought he saw a large gate of some sort peering through the trees. Was he near Underland's Room of Doors?

Suddenly, Tarrant's feet threatened to pick up their pace again as something within him stirred once more. He held his breath as he sprinted towards the gate, but then stopped as he heard a voice that was hauntingly familiar. "So there I was aboard the ship when who should appear, but Absolem. I could hardly believe it. He visited me at least a dozen times on my journey. Don't tell him I told you, but I think he was just a little afraid I had forgotten." There was a chorus of gasps and "oh's" followed by a small laugh. Tarrant spun around quickly to see the only person who could ever have that laugh.

There she was. She seemed to be in a world of her own as she conversed with the flowers. She looked like a dream, wearing a blue -that could only be described as a right-proper Alice blue- dress with a white silk sash around her waist and her hair let down in untamed curls as best suited her. Wait, was he dreaming? Tarrant knew he couldn't bear it if he was, as she seemed so close and so real.

However, before he had a chance to wake up, he saw her demeanor suddenly change. With a furrowed brow, she turned her head towards him. Then, a large smile overtook her face as she jumped to her feet. Tarrant mentally noted she was her normal size, proof she must have brought the _Upelkuchen _with her through the door and eaten a bit.

"Hatter!" She started to close the gap between them quickly.

Her voice and sudden movement tore Tarrant from his reverie and he realized it wasn't a dream after all. "Alice!" He couldn't control himself and ran the rest of the distance there was left. One hand touched her shoulder, the other one a few strands of hair, as though he was trying to prove she was as real as his heart told him she was, before he finally found both of her hands and held onto them like a giddy school-boy. "Alice, you're back! That means you remembered! You remembered Underland, and me, and…the _Upelkuchen_! You're the right-proper Alice size and…"

Before Tarrant's madness could get any further, the gap between himself and Alice closed entirely as their lips met at the same moment, both having lost all control now that they were together (and height-compatible) again. They didn't seem to notice the round of murmurs coming from the flowers or the skid of McTwisp's paws on the dirt followed by a surprised "Oh my." In fact, for all either of the two knew, maybe one – or both – of them _was_ dreaming.

There was nothing in Underland that could break the spell that had bewitched the Hatter or Champion. Nothing, that is, except the simultaneous, "Hatter!" from a dormouse and "Alice!" from a Cheshire Cat.

The sound of their names caused Alice and Tarrant to break apart and turn towards the others around them in confusion. Everything seemed a little hazy and scattered, but eventually they realized what had happened. Alice quickly moved away from Tarrant and towards her friends, excited to see them again and also not ready focus her attention on what had just taken place - in front of an audience no less. "Mally! Chess! McTwisp!"

"Don't you Mally me!" Mallymkun was not in the mood for a subject change and neither was Chessur for that matter, but McTwisp broke in nonetheless.

"The White Queen is waiting to see you," Nivens said in a dignified manner, not at all wanting to think anymore about what he had just witnessed. "I see you managed to make it here all on your own this time." The White Rabbit clasped his paws together a bit nervously. "That's very good news. I'm afraid I was late in coming to get you."

"Somehow I just knew it was time to come back," Alice smiled warmly, looking at Tarrant first before turning her gaze back to everyone else. "But I really hope this doesn't mean I have another Jabberwocky to slay," she said jokingly.

"No, none of that." McTwisp didn't even like hearing the foul beast mentioned. He shuddered a bit before starting back towards the direction he had come. "Her majesty awaits." Nivens knew Queen Mirana was patient, but he had already been late once and was not going to make a habit of it. Thus, the small group set out towards Marmoreal.

At first the journey was filled with a strange silence. It didn't seem right to Alice that she should be back in Underland, the most wonderful place she had ever been, and yet not saying a word to any of her closest friends. So, she was the first to speak. "What have you all been up to while I was away?"

"I've been hard at work with the White Queen as she works towards restoring Underland to its former glory," McTwisp spoke proudly with great admiration. It was the kind of job that would seemingly be too much for the skittish creature to handle, but he did it well. Alice smiled as her mind wandered across the parts of Underland she had already seen. She wondered how they must all look now that Queen Mirana was ruler again.

"Her majesty offered me a position as royal feline," Chessur answered the question, although his tone came across as disinterested. "I come and go as I please so I suppose nothing has changed." Alice knew it was true that Chessur could never be considered a pet. He was tame, yet feral. Nothing could stop him from doing whatever he pleased, even if deep down it pleased him to be around those he secretly called friends.

"Tea and _gallymoggers_," Mally answered shortly with a huff. She was still not past everything that had happened. Even if she had to deal with the fact that Tarrant and Alice had kissed, Mally felt like she deserved a straight explanation from one or the other.

"I see," Alice didn't press further, but mostly because she had a sudden vision of a mad tea party. It was one of the things, if not _the _thing she had missed more than anything about Underland. Well, maybe it was more than the tea party. She had a pretty good idea it had to do with the person who sat at the head of the tea tables. As her thoughts turned towards Tarrant, so did her attention. "What about you?" She was more anxious for his answer than any other. After all, she could not forget the sadness of their last meeting. She wanted more than anything for him to have been happy while she was gone.

"Her majesty offered me my old position as royal milliner," Tarrant answered solemnly.

Alice was just a bit worried by his tone. "Has it been good working at your trade again?" she asked hopefully.

"He wouldn't know," Mallmkun answered before Tarrant could. "He only worked for the queen for about a week before he gave up the position." Mally then looked up towards Alice quite angrily. "Not that you would know since you off and left him."

"MALLY!" Tarrant's mind was flooded with irrational thoughts as his eyes flickered to a light orange. Things might have taken a turn for the worse for the poor dormouse, even if she knew she had been asking for it, had not Alice reached out her hand to stop Tarrant in his tracks.

"What does she mean you gave up the position?" Alice held his arm firmly as they stood there. Her eyes searched his for an answer. "No one else can be hatter to the White Queen, but you. I don't understand."

"I couldn't do it," Tarrant dropped his head in shame, unable to find the courage to look into her eyes any longer. "I just couldn't do it, Alice."

Before he had dropped his head, Alice had seen the overwhelming sadness in Tarrant's eyes. It was the same sadness that had haunted her since she'd last left Underland. She struggled to find a way to respond, but it was as though his pain stole the very muchness inside of her. She finally released his arm and they returned to following after the others. The entire party continued in silence until nightfall came and they all decided it would be best to stop.

* * *

Once the others had settled down for the night, Alice managed to sneak away from the group, nearly undetected. She wasn't tired and the day's events, one moment in particular, occupied her mind. Tarrant, who had immediately noticed she was gone, found her standing on her own away from the small clearing they had chosen to make camp at. A part of him knew she probably wanted to be alone, but another part of him needed to see that she was okay. "I'm sorry," he whispered as he came closer.

"Sorry?" Alice had heard him coming and so wasn't too startled when his voice broke the silence. "For what?"

"I upset you." Tarrant's eyes were dark as he desperately fought the thoughts trying to cloud his reason. Knowing he had upset Alice made him angry at himself. "You deserve a joyous welcoming and instead I…"

"Don't talk like that," Alice scolded, but not too harshly. "I'm the one who should be sorry. Mally was right. How could I have known not to bring up your job as hatter?" Alice bit her lip as she stared off into the distance, not really seeing the scenery. "I never wanted to cause you pain…again," she barely whispered the last part.

Tarrant looked at her, before looking off into the distance as well. "It only hurt to tell you because I thought you would think less of me." It was no easy thing to admit. It wasn't that Tarrant wasn't certain of how he felt about Alice, but he was afraid of not being good enough for her.

Alice quickly turned her gaze towards him, not liking how the light had fallen from his eyes. "Hatt…" she stopped, swallowing hard before continuing. "_Tarrant_, I could never think less of you. I only wanted to know why you quit. I wanted to make sure it wasn't my fault. I want to help," she turned and placed her hands on his forearms gently.

Tarrant stared at her in a stupor. The sound of his name, his real name, coming from Alice had sounded perfect. It had the ability to drive away his insanity and his eyes returned to their healthy green. "It's not your fault," he smiled for a moment before it disappeared again. "It was too hard. There were too many memories."

"Of your family," it wasn't really a question, but a statement of knowing. "That must have been very difficult for you."

"I _wanted _to be hatter to the White Queen again," Tarrant continued. "I still do. A Hightopp has always been employed at court. I'm letting down my clan." Before he had a chance to stop it, his madness boiled up inside of him and his eyes began growing towards a fiery orange.

Alice was glad she was in a position to see it as she moved her hands from his arms to his cheeks; she was grateful this time her hands weren't twice the size of his head. "Do you remember what the White Queen told me on Frabjous Day? You cannot live your life to please other people. You cannot live to please your family, Mally, the Queen…" Alice paused, wondering if she should be so bold as to finish her thought. "Not even me," she relented before letting her hands fall back to her sides. "And who said anything about my welcome not being joyous?" She decided to change the subject, hoping to prove she wasn't bent on him doing something he wasn't comfortable with.

"Well, I…the silence…and you seemed so…and…" Tarrant fumbled for a reasonable answer.

"And _you_," Alice finished, her tone a positive one. "_You_ were there to meet me. Nothing could have been better. I dreamed so many times of coming back, but never once did you come and find me," Alice admitted before a thoughtful expression came over her. "How _did_ you know to come find me? Did McTwisp send you?"

In his excitement over Alice being back, Tarrant had not given it much thought. "I don't know," he said shyly. "Nobody sent me. It was the oddest thing, really," he started to recall the events that had unfolded much earlier. "I was sitting at tea with Mally and Thackery and not quite enjoying it as much as I should have because you were not there at the time and I…"

"Tarrant," Alice said patiently despite her anxiousness for him to finish his story.

"Thank you," Tarrant shook his head and gathered himself again. "So there I was when all of a sudden I had the strangest feeling come over me. I had been feeling quite lonely as I missed you a great deal while you were away." Alice felt her heartbeat quicken a little as he spoke. She wasn't sure if she should feel guilty or happy about the direction the tale had taken. "But then, the loneliness vanished!"

"Vanished?" Alice echoed, not sure what to assume just yet.

"Entirely," Tarrant nodded. "At first it confused me, but then before I knew what was happening, my thoughts were screaming your name and my feet found a mind of their own." Tarrant looked thoughtful for a moment as he continued to recall what had happened and how perfect he had felt the closer he had gotten to Alice. At the time he hadn't been certain why his mood had changed, but now he understood. "I don't know how, but I knew you were back."

Alice felt her breath hitch in her throat as she thought about what Tarrant had said. "You knew?" She wanted to be positive she had heard him right and that her mind hadn't just imagined it.

"I knew," Tarrant's answer sent a chill down both of their spines.

Alice wondered how she had ever managed to leave him before. "I missed you a great deal too." She intertwined her fingers with his before their lips met in another perfect kiss. And this time there was no dormouse or cat to interrupt.

* * *

**Alright, so I know a whole heck of a lot happened in just the first chapter as far as Tarrant/Alice goes, but it had to be this way to drive the rest of the story. Plus, if you listen to the song or have ever heard it, you'll know that it starting this way won't guarantee a smooth ride ;) And omg 4000 words, I seriously can't gauge length! Future chapters probably will most definitely be shorter.  
**


	2. It Only Causes Pain

**Author's Note:** Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed, fave'd and alerted this story! It makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside.

**Chapter 2**

_**It Only Causes Pain  
**_

"Our Champion has returned," Mirana declared triumphantly as the royal court watched Alice, Tarrant, Mally, Chessur and McTwisp approach the castle. There was a round of cheers that made Alice feel flattered and embarrassed both. It was a little strange hearing herself called the Champion again. "I declare a celebration to be held at Brillig. But first," Mirana flittered down the stairs like her feet had barely touched the ground. "I wish to speak to Alice," she smiled and turned, politely indicating she wished for her to follow.

Alice looked at Tarrant for a few seconds before following after the White Queen. She wondered what the queen might want to speak about and once they were alone in a part of the gardens, Alice realized she had a lot she wished to speak to someone about too. "It's wonderful to be back," Alice opted for a nice, polite greeting as opposed to bombarding the queen all at once.

"We've all missed you, my dear," Mirana smiled warmly. "How was your journey to Marmoreal?"

Only two moments stood out in Alice's mind from the day before, prompting her to answer favorably. "Wonderful," she said contently.

"I noticed Tarrant came with you. Did you stop first at Thackery's home?" Alice wondered how she should answer this particular question. She wanted more than anything to confide in the queen, but she wasn't sure if she should. "Thackery would have loved to have seen you sooner, I'm certain, but he has been in the kitchens since yesterday afternoon." Mirana raised one of her eyebrows in curiosity, realizing something was not being said. After all, Thackery had come to Marmoreal all on his own saying he had nothing to do and that alone was suspicious.

"Tarrant came to meet me actually. Near the door that leads to Underland," Alice could tell there would be no escaping some kind of confession.

"How wondrous!" Mirana exclaimed as her eyes widened and her dark lips parted in a wide smile. "How did he ever know I wonder," she shook her head as she said it, not really expecting an answer. "Well, I suppose he would know better than the Oraculum whenever you've returned," Mirana guessed.

"The Oraculum?" Alice had wondered what McTwisp had meant about her needing to come back and she had felt the urge herself quite strongly before deciding to return, but she hadn't expected anything to be said in the Oraculum about it.

"It's why I wanted to speak with you," Mirana's voice changed from happiness to a slightly more worried tone. She looked around to be sure no one had followed. She even, spun a few times, gracefully feeling the air around them as she did, to make certain Chessur was not eavesdropping. Finally, she looked at Alice again. "The Oraculum did foretell your returning to us again, although we have kept it a secret should it have taken the notion to change." By this she meant they had not had the nerve to tell Tarrant should something have happened.

"Can it change?" Alice remembered when Tarrant, followed by the others, had stepped forth to be Champion when she had not. However, it had not changed the Oraculum from showing someone besides herself.

"It is rare, but it has been known to happen. Often, however, attempting to change it leads to fulfilling it," Mirana tried to explain the strange way the scroll worked. "But you see, some parts of the Oraculum are hidden from our eyes until it is time to see them. We were allowed to see the Frabjous Day, but it wasn't until after you were gone that your departure appeared in the Oraculum." Mirana paused so Alice could process what she had said. "Therefore, we weren't sure if there was something else about your return we have not yet seen."

"Oh. Does it say why I'm here though?" Alice asked. She wanted to know what was expected of her. Why had the queen brought up the subject?

"I'm afraid not," Mirana frowned a little, causing Alice even more confusion. "More reason for why we chose to keep it a secret." Mirana hoped Alice wouldn't think less of her as a ruler for having kept something from her subjects. However, there wasn't time to dwell on it. There was something much more urgent which needed discussing. "It is what comes after your arrival that has me concerned. The Oraculum seems to predict something about Tarrant."

Alice felt her stomach sink. She could tell by Mirana's demeanor that whatever it was, it was not good. She suddenly forgot herself and demanded, "Tell me what it says! I have to know!"

Mirana responded a very undignified sigh. She couldn't be angry at Alice for her outburst. "What we have seen cannot be certain," she started, hesitating slightly. She then pulled out the scroll from where it had been discreetly hidden within the folds of her dress before. Very gently, she rolled it open upon a nearby bench.

Alice slowly took a few steps closer before dropping to her knees for a closer look. Her eyes immediately found the first image of Tarrant. He appeared to be ripping a hat and Alice could only guess it was a depiction of a fit of rage. The next image was curiouser as he appeared to be drinking something. Following that was what seemed like a perfectly normal image of Tarrant at a tea party, yet for some reason that Alice couldn't place, it appeared odd and made her shiver.

Mirana closed her eyes in anticipation as Alice's eyes narrowed on the last image. Tarrant was lying still with eyes closed and his hat within his hands on his chest. Panic washed over Alice as she moved away from the Oraculum as quickly as possible, standing to her feet as she did. "Why isn't he moving?" She asked fearfully. All of the other images moved, but this one didn't. "Is he…" Alice couldn't bring herself to say it as Mirana hurried to roll the scroll back up.

"I don't know," the White Queen stated coldly as she turned to look at the horrified Champion. "Alice, please remember there is no telling…" Mirana let her sentence trail as she placed the backside of her hand to Alice's cheek. Then, losing all of her royal dignity for a moment, Mirana wrapped her arms around Alice in a comforting hug.

"I can't lose him," Alice no longer cared what the queen would think about what she said regarding Tarrant. "Not after seeing him again. I didn't realize how much I cared for him until we…" she didn't finish, but Mirana didn't need her to in order to guess what had transpired between the two.

Mirana's heart ached deeply, a feeling she hated and had not experienced since she had first been banished by her sister. She regretted having chosen to trouble Alice so soon after her arrival and especially so soon after realizing her feelings for Tarrant. "Now is not the time to dwell on such things."

"But I…" Alice started to protest. How could she be expected to celebrate and be merry? How could she _not_ dwell on the possibility that she could lose Tarrant? Especially now that she had been so certain she might have him.

Mirana gently shushed her before whispering strange yet soothing words of some Underlandian sort into Alice's ears. Before Alice could ask what they meant, she felt her eyes grow heavy and a haze fell over the world around her as she drifted to sleep.

* * *

There was a loud commotion to be heard from somewhere nearby as Alice's eyes opened and tried to focus on what was going on, or for that matter, where she was at. She slowly sat up in the chaise she had apparently fallen asleep in. As she looked around and took in one white object after another, she quickly realized she was somewhere in Marmoreal.

She was about to get up to go look around when she suddenly felt like she wasn't alone. "Chess? Is that you?" The Chesire Cat was the first creature to come to mind. At first, there was no answer, but then Alice thought she heard the distinct sound of a sniffing nose and wagging tail. She turned around to see a dog sitting nearby. "Bayard!" She exclaimed, but then took a closer look. "Wait, you're not Bayard."

The dog immediately came closer to the chaise. "I'm Belorn," the young dog said proudly as he looked at her. "Bayard's my father."

"So you're one of Bayard's puppies?" Alice could hardly believe her eyes at seeing how much the puppy had grown since she'd last seen him and his siblings. She marveled at how Time went about his business in Underland. She had been in her world for nearly four years and had suspected much longer would have passed in Underland as it had seemed when she'd returned previously to find her engagement party still going on. But Bayard's son seemed to be no more than a young dog of two.

Belorn came even closer and sniffed Alice's hand, jolting her from pondering Time any further. "You're the Champion!" His tail wagged even faster.

"You have a good memory, Belorn," Alice smiled in amusement as she reached out and scratched one of his floppy ears.

"Belorn never forgets a scent." He placed both front paws on the chaise so he appeared as though he might jump onto her lap entirely.

"But he does forget where he is and isn't supposed to be," the voice was a familiar one and caused Belorn to sit back down on the floor in a hurry.

"Now that's Bayard," Alice said as he joined them. She moved so that both of her feet touched the floor on one side of the chaise. She then reached out both hands and scratched both of his ears affectionately. "It's so good to see you again. How are you?"

"When Belorn here isn't up to something, I'm good," Bayard chuckled as Belorn groaned in embarrassment. Alice mused to herself that even a two year old dog (if he really was two years old) must still be like a child. "Of course, my family and I still have you and Hatter to thank for that."

"Mostly Hatter," Alice said humbly as she thought fondly of Tarrant. She could still remember the joy she'd felt seeing him coming towards Marmoreal safely. And she'd been just as taken by the fact he had thought to free Bielle and the puppies.

"If you ever need anything, just ask," Bayard offered kindly before turning to leave the room again.

"You can always count on me too, Champion," Belorn offered heroically, causing Alice to let out a small laugh.

"Well, as long as you call me Alice, I'm glad to hear it." She petted him a few more times and he licked her hand in return.

"Alright you, let's go," Bayard chuckled as he looked back at his son and motioned for him to come. After Belorn had hurried past, Bayard looked at Alice and shook his head as if to sarcastically say "kids" before leaving Alice laughing alone.

"I see you're awake," Mirana came into the room no more than a minute after Bayard and Belorn had left. "I hope you enjoyed your slumber."

All at once, Alice remembered the confusion she had felt prior to her conversation with the two dogs. She looked around again before looking at the White Queen. "It was lovely, yes, thank you, but I don't actually remember falling asleep."

"Oh, um, what do you mean?" Mirana asked casually, although Alice thought she heard a hint of uncertainty in the queen's voice.

"Well, honestly, the last thing I remember is you telling me you wanted to speak with me, then nothing," Alice shook her head just a little, trying hard to recall what had happened next. "Did we talk?"

"Yes, we did," Mirana nodded as an awkward silence seemed to fill the room.

"I must have been really tired," Alice finally shrugged indifferently. She didn't remember feeling tired, but apparently she had to have been.

"Well, it was quite the journey on foot," Mirana breathed an inner sigh of relief. She was nearly certain her vows would not have allowed her to actually lie to Alice had a question called for it. "But now you are yourself again and the celebration will begin soon." The White Queen held out her hand and Alice stood to her feet and took it. "Which means, we must get you ready."

* * *

"I don't believe I've ever felt freer in a dress in all my life." Alice spun as she admired how the fabric moved and breathed in a way she could scarcely describe. Even the breathtaking blue was one she had never worn, let alone seen, before. Although, Alice was certain simply calling it blue did not do it justice. It seemed more as though it were the color of the evening sky. If she didn't know it was impossible, she would almost think someone had found a way to weave twilight into the dress. Then again it was Underland so maybe it wasn't impossible.

Mirana looked her over and nodded approvingly (although she would approve of most anything since she was not one to say what was proper or not). She agreed that the dress suited Alice perfectly. "I told Tarrant you would adore it."

"Tarrant?" Alice stopped studying the dress and looked at the White Queen. Now that the queen had said it, she knew it only made sense. It surprised her she hadn't realized right away that the only person who could make such a dress would be Tarrant. "How did he ever find time?" For a dress of such craftsmanship, she wondered how he had managed it. Sure, he had made her a dress in just a few seconds the last time she had been in Underland, but that had been just a tiny thing. Not like this. Alice knew it would take any milliner in London days to create a beautiful dress like this one, if they were even able to replicate it at all.

"He went straight to the milliner's work room after he heard you had gone to rest," Mirana answered as calmly as she could manage. Queen or not, she had several things further about Tarrant she wished to discuss with Alice now that she knew of the feelings which existed between them – or at least now that _they _knew of the feelings that had always existed – and she was bubbling to get to the topic. "Of course, he first asked me if it was alright for him to do so to which I answered yes. He then asked me if I would take him back as royal milliner altogether. I am so happy Tarrant seems to be himself again." She eyed Alice, certain she might have something to do with his sudden change of disposition.

Alice, on the other hand, wasn't certain whether or not she should be pleased or worried for Tarrant. If he had said he couldn't handle the memories, why had he chosen to retake the position she wondered. However, the White Queen barely gave her time to think about it before speaking again. "So, about Tarrant," Mirana tried to sound casual and dignified, but Alice could see a familiar sparkle in her eye. It was a hope of something romantic. She'd seen it before in her sister's eyes. Only now, Alice wasn't wary of it.

"I have the oddest feeling we've discussed Tarrant already." Alice furrowed her brow a little as she gave the subject a bit of thought.

"We did," Mirana looked at her nervously. "Earlier."

"Did I mention…" Alice hesitated for a moment, but decided she was ready to open up to someone else. That is, if she hadn't already. Why couldn't she remember? "I kissed him," Alice finally admitted. "I mean, he kissed me. Or perhaps we kissed each other." The details were fuzzy since it had happened so quickly, both times. She knew there would be no figuring out who initiated the kiss, nor did she care.

Mirana didn't seem to care either as she could barely contain her joy over the simple fact that a kiss had happened. "I'm so happy for you both! It is exciting to think of the two of you together."

"It is exciting," Alice nodded in agreement, although she knew she and Tarrant were far from actually being together in the sense she knew the queen hoped for. After all, she had just returned and everything had happened before she'd barely had a chance to even blink. However, she had known the moment she had seen Tarrant again, all of the more than platonic feelings she had felt here and there on her previous adventure had blossomed into something she could no longer deny. Alice had never expected any man would be able to make her happy like the very thought of Tarrant now did. Then again, she had only been thinking in terms of her world and not Underland. Actually, she was now certain that her deep rooted feelings for Tarrant had spoiled her, even further than her own independent spirit, for any man in her world after she had returned home.

McTwisp entered the chamber, interrupting the two women from discussing the subject in more detail, and announced that everything was ready for the celebration to begin. "Thank you, Nivens," Mirana smiled, resuming her royal poise. "You may announce us both in a few moments." The White Rabbit nodded before hopping out of the chamber again. "I cannot wait to see Tarrant's face when he sees you," Mirana clasped her hands together in complete ecstasy. "Although, I'm afraid Tarrant will probably find himself having to share you this evening. Everyone in Underland will want a moment with their Champion."

Alice gave a hesitant smile before following the White Queen towards the party. Champion or not, Alice still wasn't sure if she would enjoy being smothered with more attention than she felt she deserved.

* * *

**No clue WHERE the idea for Belorn came from, since I rarely do OCs anymore, but I picture him as the pup who leaned up against the bars in the dungeon scene in the movie. And, since Time really is funny in Underland, I can't say he really _is _two, but simply that he appears to be a very young dog and he is in a sense a tween or something of that sort. I guess, if he is 2, and if you went in dog years, he'd be 14 :) Also, yeah, I totally took liberties with how the Oraculum works - sense it seems sketchy enough in the movie. Not to mention, in case anyone caught it, I totally stole...uh...borrowed the "fulfilling the Oraculum by trying to change it" concept from _Kung Fu Panda. _  
**


	3. You Asked Me To Dance

**Chapter 3  
**

_**You Asked Me To Dance  
**_

Alice had never been to a party of any sort in London which she had felt comfortable at. Once again, Underland proved to her she could be very much the girl her mother had wanted her to be if in the right atmosphere. This grand soirée was neither dull nor stuffy and there was absolutely NO quadrille! Alice felt at home as she reunited with her old friends and danced with the Tweedles and even Thackery.

However, there was only one person she truly cared to dance with, or at least see dance, and he was nowhere to be seen. At first, Alice had suspected Tarrant might have been lying low for one reason or another. She wondered if he had been giving her space to catch up with the other Underland inhabitants. She wondered if he had been busy elsewhere. She even dared to wonder if he was maybe overwhelmed by what had taken place between them and unsure of how to approach her.

But as the celebration continued and Tarrant remained undetected, Alice began to worry. "Chessur," she finally decided to get someone else's input. "Have you seen Tarrant?"

"Why? So you can ruin the festivities with a display of affection?" Chessur was not usually one to be snide in any way with Alice, but what he had seen the day before clearly irritated him as much as it did Mally. "To answer your question, no, I haven't," he changed his tone a little, slightly regretting having been so snarky with her. "Mallymkun is the one you should be asking. Rarely does she let him out of her sight," he added helpfully. "But can I ask _you _a question?"

Alice was desperate to find Tarrant, but decided she shouldn't be so worried as to be rude to the Chesire Cat. Tarrant was probably perfectly fine wherever he was, she reasoned. "Of course, Chess."

"Have you always felt this way? About Tarrant, I mean," he eyed her curiously and Alice had a hard time deciphering what prompted his question. At one moment he seemed horrified and at another concerned. At another moment he seemed jealous, but he seemed hopeful the very next.

She pondered his question carefully. The very fact that she had kissed Tarrant so soon after returning betrayed that she must have. Alice's mind went back to how close she had been to him on her previous trip and how at a few moments she had wanted to kiss him even then. Of course, she couldn't be certain of her adventure before that. She had only been six after all and she still found she couldn't remember every detail. Even if she could, Tarrant would have been as any other adult man – perhaps someone a young girl admired, but nothing too seriously. This was something she had never truly considered before now and it did confuse her a little.

"I don't know," she finally answered. Alice didn't know how to answer. Again, everything was happening so quickly. She saw Chessur's dissatisfied expression. "But I can tell you, I believe I have felt something for him since my last time here."

Chess brought one paw to his face thoughtfully. "I suspected as much," he nodded. It had been painfully obvious that there was a strong bond between the Mad Hatter and Underland's Champion. However, it wasn't quite as obvious whether or not Tarrant was the only one with feelings of more than a platonic nature. "I was hoping that perhaps you had better taste than to actually return Tarrant's romantic notions, not that he probably even realized he had romantic notions," he rolled his eyes. While Chessur had a soft spot for Alice which kept him from saying anything too rude to her, the same did not apply to Tarrant.

"Now, Chess, really," Alice looked at the feline somewhat disapprovingly. "Tarrant is…"

"Still missing," Chessur reminded her. He was not in the mood to hear her fawn over the Hatter even in the least. "So there's Mally," he pointed before evaporating to find another location somewhere else.

Alice was brought back to her prior concern as she heeded Chessur's words and hurried over to the dormouse. "Mally, have you seen Tarrant?"

"No," the agitation in Mally's voice was evident. "Hasn't he been following you around like he'll never see you again?" She looked up at Alice to see her shake her head. Now Alice wasn't the only one concerned regarding Tarrant's whereabouts.

"I haven't seen him since early this morning," Alice answered. "I only know he has to be somewhere in the castle since he made me this dress." Suddenly inspiration hit Alice and she ran out of the grand ballroom to find the milliner's workroom. She didn't even think to ask for someone to point her in the right direction. Thankfully, though, her feet found the way on their own.

Alice stopped in the doorway of the workroom only to find several hats shredded here and there. Then her eyes found what they were looking for. Sitting on the floor against one of the walls, Tarrant wore a terrified expression and his eyes were the brightest color of amber Alice had ever seen. He was _not _perfectly fine.

She moved towards Tarrant as quickly as she could and dropped to her knees in front of him as soon as she reached him. "Tarrant!" Her voice pierced his madness as though it were a Vorpal Sword slaying a Jabberwocky.

The intensity in his eyes lessened as he managed to focus on her face. "They're ashamed of me, Alice. Terribly ashamed."

"Who is ashamed?" Alice didn't quite understand, but she wanted to be able to.

"I can't do it," his words echoed from the day before as his eyes fell towards his top hat, which lied nearby, and Alice grasped what he meant. "I've let them down." Tarrant moved his hands to his hair, seemingly in pain as he said it.

At this, a sort of madness overtook Alice as well, but not uncontrollably so. She couldn't help but be enraged over the suffering Tarrant would always have to endure. Alice grabbed his hands and pulled them from his head, holding them firmly in her own. "No one is ashamed of you." She didn't say it loudly, for fear she would frighten him further in his already panicked state, but there was urgency in her voice which couldn't be missed. She needed him to understand what she said was true. "_I'm_ not ashamed of you."

Finally, Tarrant's eyes found their green again, although not quite the bright green they normally were, and Alice felt like she could breathe once more. "Alice?" Tarrant seemed to come back to himself completely, as he looked around the room and the understanding of what had happened returned to him – for it seemed sometimes he didn't even realize he was lost in madness until after it passed.

Suddenly Mally and Mirana came into the room, Mally scurrying all the way over to Tarrant and Alice (but mostly Tarrant) while Mirana merely floated in concern near the entry. This was not at all the way Mirana had planned for the celebration to go and, for Mirana, disorder made for a very scary thing. "Is he alright now?" She put aside her own discomforting feelings for the good of the poor Hatter.

"Yes," Alice smiled at Tarrant reassuringly as she squeezed his hands. "But perhaps the party…" Alice didn't have a chance to finish before Tarrant hurried to his feet bringing her with him.

"Oh no, I'm fine now," he shook his head and then smiled as if to prove his point. "I would not want you to miss the party on my account. Especially since you look so," Tarrant paused for a moment. It was the first time he had noticed she was wearing the dress he'd made her. Realizing he was attempting to study her, Alice let go of his hands and stepped back so he could properly see how she looked in his marvelous creation. She even spun once, again feeling very perfect in the article of clothing. "You look more beautiful than anyone I've ever seen," Tarrant felt timidity and brazenness both grip him as he debated whether he should cower from her in unworthiness or take her into his arms right there. "If the White Queen doesn't mind my saying so," he settled on neither thought and spoke instead.

"I don't mind at all," Mirana responded with pure pleasure. Not only was she happy that order seemed to have resumed its previous position, but she also could barely keep from controlling her urge to squeal in sheer delight at the romantic scene before her. But, of course, that would be very un-Queen-like.

"Well, I mind a little," Alice answered, but not in spite of his comment – as it made her heart melt in ways she never suspected it could. Tarrant looked at her curiously. "After all, Mally is just as beautiful," Alice said amiably as she looked down at the dormouse.

"Of course, of course!" Tarrant certainly didn't want to offend his friend. "I'm sorry, Mally. You're beautiful too." He smiled a genuine smile and Mallymkun wasn't quite sure how to react.

"Alright, alright we're _all_ beautiful." Mally opted for her usual tough exterior. "Let's just get back to the party," she insisted before leading the way out of the room.

Once back in the ballroom, Mirana reassured everyone that everything was fine and the festivities should carry on as they had been. Alice, however, decided the rest of the party, for her part, would be spent by Tarrant's side. Although he seemed okay again, Alice couldn't escape a nagging thought in the back of her mind that something worse was amiss. It was just a very fuzzy notion, but it still threatened to wreak havoc on her joy.

Thankfully, however, it didn't shatter her mood entirely. It simply couldn't with Tarrant there beside her. Every moment with him made her more and more certain of how strongly and deeply she felt for him. It surprised her how deep her emotions could go. She was, after all, Alice Kingsleigh. She was not like other women her age. First of all, other women her age could not say they had slayed a Jabberwocky. Second of all, she did not go about falling head over heels like women her age were expected to do even if against reason – like her sister had done.

Then again, she _had_ fallen head over heels for him in the most literal sense, she mused. And now that she had landed in Underland again, Alice felt quite certain that if Tarrant begged her to stay, this time she would. Because everything was different in Underland. _She _was different in Underland. Or was it that she was actually herself in Underland?

Alice's thoughts were interrupted, but it was a happy intrusion since it was Tarrant very nervously asking her if she would care to dance. If it were any man other than Tarrant and were she in any place other than Underland, she would have said no (well, maybe not if Tarrant was the one doing the asking some place other than Underland). But it _was _Tarrant and it _was _Underland and at the moment there was nothing more she would rather do.

"Yes," she nodded, loving the way he smiled and excitedly led her towards the center of the room.

Dancing in Underland was an adventure all its own. At moments Tarrant and Alice moved gracefully and at other moments like a scattered mess. Some steps brought them close together and others were performed completely apart. At one point their dance resembled a waltz, yet at another it resembled a polka. Then, there were points where it lacked definition entirely. However, the age old magic spell of dance remained and it wasn't long before the rest of the ballroom spun out of sight and out of mind. No matter the dance step, Alice and Tarrant felt as though they were the only ones in Underland. It wasn't until the music ended that they were forced to recognize the existence of the other partygoers again.

"You both dance divinely together," Mirana moved towards the couple so gracefully it seemed as though she were attempting her own dance of some sort, a lovely ballet perhaps. Alice smiled uncertainly. She had never been accused of being a wonderful dancer in London, but that was most likely because she had only ever had someone like Hamish Ascot to dance with.

"I'm so happy to be back," the words escaped Alice's lips before she'd even had a chance to figure out where they'd come from. It was as if a chill had gone through her body and the realization had finally struck her that she really was back. Additionally, she felt an inexplicable urgency to make the most of every moment. That nagging feeling of something not being right returned. Only now, it was stronger and more precisely it felt like Time was against her.

"Alice, dear, are you alright?" Mirana had noted the change in her expression.

"I…I don't know," Alice answered honestly. She looked back and forth between Tarrant and Mirana, as if there was something important about both of them she should remember. "Something doesn't feel right."

Mirana bit her lip before releasing it with a heavy sigh. As much as she had wanted the celebration to go well, for there to be no trace of pain in any of her subjects, Mirana realized she couldn't control everything. She must relinquish the idea that there was room for celebration when Fate was close to dealing a cruel blow to the two most undeserving people she could think of. "Alice, I'm sorry. When we talked earlier we…" The White Queen was unable to finish as Tarrant stormed out of the ballroom, his eyes very clearly a mad shade of orange as he did.

Mally scampered over to Alice and the queen and stared up at them in confusion. "What happened now?"

"I don't know, Mally." Alice stared at the doorway in concern. She had to find out what was wrong with him.

"I thought you being back was supposed to make things better not worse," Alice heard the annoyed dormouse say as she left to chase after Tarrant.

"Mallymkun!" Mirana exclaimed disapprovingly. Her tone was not harsh, but it was just the kind of benevolent tone that could make any guilty party immediately realize the error of their ways.

"I'm sorry, your majesty." Mally slumped her shoulders a bit in defeat. "I just want to know what's goin' on around here." The dormouse's fierceness returned quickly. "It seems like everything is upside down since she got back."

Mirana looked down at the little mouse with a sympathetic smile. It was clear to the White Queen that jealousy was a strong driving force behind Mally's comment. "Upside down for everyone or just you, Mally?" She asked in such a quiet manner that it repelled against Mally's brash nature and took the dormouse off her guard for a few moments.

"Upside down period," Mally finally said apologetically, and with great conviction, before turning back in the direction she'd came.

As Mirana watched Mally stop at Thackery's side, where she'd been previously, she couldn't help but realize there was more truth in Mally's words than she cared to openly admit. The uncertainty of Tarrant's fate _was _enough to turn Underland upside down. In Mirana's mind, it was as though heaviness had indeed already settled over the land like it hadn't since her sister's tyrannical reign. Underland and its inhabitants, even if they didn't understand why, were all feeling the weight of what could possibly come. For what would Underland be without its Mad Hatter?

* * *

**Alright, so I realized half-way through writing that while I can hear Mally's strong accent in my head when creating her dialogue, it never transfers to the way I write the words. So, since I'm already two chapters ahead in this story, I've decided it's too late to go through and make her accent more accounted for. Sorry if anyone has noticed that and/or thinks it less realistic for that reason. Also, sorry if it seems Alice is a little all over the place emotionally in this chapter. I wanted to delve a little into Alice's character as realizing her feelings for Tarrant are stronger than she ever dreamed they could be in comparison to her usually independent nature. I also chose to go this direction as it fits with the character of the narrative voice of the song, _Trainwreck. _In short, Alice isn't uncertain of her feelings for Tarrant so much as she is a little overwhelmed by how this changes a lot of the things she's come to know about herself (but, hey, isn't that how love goes sometimes?).  
**


	4. Even Though You Might Be Crazy

**Chapter 4  
**

_**Even Though You Might Be Crazy  
**_

Alice moved as quickly as she could, looking for the direction the Hatter had taken. She wanted to find him and stop him from hurting any longer than he needed to. She turned here and there through the many halls of Marmoreal before finding the main foyer. As if understanding her mission, one of the White Guards pointed towards the doors. "Thank you," Alice said as she hurried past them and outside. By now the sun had long set and down the long path that led to and from Marmoreal, Alice could see a dark figure that would almost be unrecognizable if not for the bright orange hair that appeared to be moving further and further away from the palace. "Tarrant!" Alice called out before running down the stairs and in his direction.

Tarrant stopped in his tracks, frozen in place by the sound of her voice. However, it didn't release him from the uncertainty, fear and other emotions that went along with his madness. "Go back, lass. Ah'm nae goo' fer ye."

Now Alice was the one who had stopped. As her eyes adjusted in the darkness of nightfall, she saw the way his fists clenched and unclenched at his sides. She could tell that part of him hated himself for saying what he had, but the other part of him wouldn't let him see reason. Alice gritted her teeth angrily, wishing the madness would give him just one night of rest. "Then turn and look at me," she challenged. She knew she wasn't talking to the rational side of the man she cared for, but the irrational side. She wanted the madness to know who it had to deal with now that she'd returned. "I said, look at me," Alice spoke defiantly again when he hadn't turned around. "If you are going to tell me you don't want me, then you're going to have to tell me where I can see your face. Or else, I won't go back." She spoke with all the muchness she had and it caused Tarrant to slowly heed her instruction.

As soon as he laid eyes on her, all of the confidence of a Champion shining in her eyes as she stood there, his sanity began to fight back. How could he have dared to tell her to go back? What if she had thought he'd meant for her to leave Underland? He could never live without her now that she was so near again. "Alice," it was all he could manage, his lisp as strong as she had ever heard it, as his eyes changed to a dark green.

Alice wasted no time in using this as an opportunity to move closer to him. "Everything is okay, Tarrant," she reassured him as she placed one hand to his cheek. "What happened?" She hoped he would be sane enough now to explain, at least a little.

Tarrant placed one of his hands atop hers as it still rested on his face. "You said something wasn't right and I thought maybe it…was my fault." He turned his head away. He couldn't bring himself to look at her as he said it. "I thought maybe you realized how terribly mad I am because of what happened in the work room and that you made a mistake ever kissing me and that I'm not good enough for you, which I know I'm not and…"

"Tarrant!" In the midst of his descent back towards madness, both of their hands had fallen.

"Thank you," Tarrant choked out gratefully. "I'm fine."

She wanted to believe him, but she feared for him too. It hurt her every time she witnessed what the madness put him through. Furthermore, she wondered if _he _believed it every time he said he was fine. He never sounded too convinced of his words. "You're more than fine, Tarrant," Alice said determinedly, for both of their sakes. "You're wonderful. Don't ever think you're not good enough for me in any sense." She craned her neck to make eye contact, forcing him to turn his own head so he was facing her again.

"B-but you're _the _Alice and I'm just…"

"_The _Hatter," she stopped him before he could finish. "You're a Hightopp. Good enough for royal court and certainly good enough for me." Alice could tell her words hit him harder than she had meant them too. He flinched a little as he debated what she said with great intensity. Finally, a very faint smile touched the corner of his lips and she felt it safe to continue. "And another thing," she paused. Before Tarrant could react, Alice kissed him ever so lightly, chastely even. "Kissing you will never be a mistake," she finished her previous statement once she had stepped back.

"This isn't how I wanted your first night back at Marmoreal to go," Tarrant was amazed any words managed to make it past his searing lips. Even such an innocent kiss from Alice felt as passionate as one could ever imagine.

"I doubt it is how the queen wanted it to go either." At first Alice chuckled a little at the thought, but then the feeling of something amiss returned again. Alice tried hard to hide it from Tarrant. She did not want to discuss it again, nor could she since she had no way of explaining it."But as long as I'm with you, I'm okay with how everything has turned out," she smiled, hoping he hadn't noticed her momentary change in mood.

They shared a delightful moment of silence, both smiling at one another, before Tarrant spoke again. "They'll be expecting us inside." He was determined for her to properly enjoy the rest of the celebration with no more interruption.

Alice turned and looked back at the palace. She then took in the rest of her surroundings. She relished in the fresh night breeze and watched as hundreds of cherry blossoms floated to the ground. Alice was nearly certain the cherry trees of Marmoreal were always in blossom and that no matter how many flowers fell, the trees would never be depleted. "I've never had a chance to tell you before, but I've never been one for dancing." She didn't see the curious look the Hatter gave her, as though it were impossible for anyone to dislike dancing. "I'd much rather walk through the gardens a little while," she turned back and looked at him hopefully. The night was beautiful and she really didn't want to return to the ballroom just yet.

Tarrant was more than happy to concede to the idea. If he had kept a list of things he'd longed to do upon Alice's return, a moonlit stroll through Marmoreal's gardens would have most definitely been on it. He held out his arm enthusiastically and Alice latched onto it with an equal amount of enthusiasm as he led the way. At first, they strolled together in a very contented silence, but eventually Tarrant's mind got the better of him and he said the thought he had been mulling over for several minutes, trying hard not to speak for fear it would further ruin Alice's night. "But I am still terribly mad, you know?" She had addressed his comments about not being good enough and the mistake of kissing him, but nothing of his madness.

Alice smiled, and even from an angle, Tarrant could see the way her eyes sparkled. "I do know," she answered, but there was no reason for Tarrant to be alarmed. There was a sort of pride and affection in her tone which he did not understand, but it eased his worries nonetheless. "You are terribly, delightfully, wonderfully, perfectly mad." Tarrant smiled in spite of himself, and in spite of the voice inside his head that argued against Alice's comment. "Besides, you're only half-mad," she added. "And so am I remember?" She had never been able to forget that night they'd shared on one of Marmoreal's balconies. It had haunted her dreams so many nights when she was away from Underland.

"Yes, yes, but that was only because we decided you must be half-mad to have dreamed me up," Tarrant countered. "But you didn't actually dream me up, so it's quite possible you aren't really half-mad at all."

Alice stopped for a moment, standing there with her arm still in Tarrant's as she considered his very sane words. It seemed to be a valid point, but on the other hand she often _felt _half-mad. At least, she did when not in Underland. Perhaps not in the same sense as Tarrant and possibly more along the lines of her father's brilliant madness, but half-mad just the same. "Well, I still believe in six impossible things before breakfast and I still have visions of flying or anything else that fancies my imagination. And I'm here, with you," she said as they started walking again. "I'm convinced I would not have been able to come to Underland at all if I weren't at least a little mad. I don't think this place would have had me." She thought there had to be some kind of magic in the land that knew only a mad person could come to Underland and believe it. She also thought it had to know that only another mad person could understand Tarrant as deeply as she did, or at least longed to. Yet, there was another part of her that was happy, even if selfishly so, to think of the fact that she was sane enough for the both of them when she needed to be.

Tarrant smiled, his mind satisfied enough to let the subject be. His thoughts wandered to how beautiful Alice looked in the moonlight – and also in the dress he'd fashioned for her – and how perfect he felt when she was so close to him. He had missed her so deeply when she'd left that he was sure there would never be any way for him to coherently convey to her how much so. There were still so many things he wanted to say to her now that she was back, but the right words never seemed to come.

Suddenly, a fear gripped him so strongly he couldn't move. Alice, having been yanked backwards a few steps by Tarrant's sudden lack of motion, turned so she was facing him. Her eyes, filled with concern, studied his face. "I'm frightened," he whispered, as though he was also afraid admitting it would cause something terrible to happen. "I-I don't know why." It was the truth. He couldn't place his finger on what it was that had taken hold of his peace. He only knew it was a most unpleasant feeling.

Alice understood immediately what he might be going through. "A dreadfully urgent feeling?" She held her breath, waiting for an answer.

Tarrant nodded very solemnly. He was grateful she was able to peg it where he hadn't quite yet. "It's like…like…" he struggled to find the words he needed in this seemingly critical moment. "It's like Time is playing a very mean joke on me," Tarrant finally managed to make sense of it. "It's like he keeps whispering in my ear that there isn't much left."

Alice felt her whole world spin out of control. It was a sensation worse than falling down the rabbit hole. She wanted to take Tarrant's hands in hers and reassure him that everything would be okay, but she couldn't even convince herself of it. She didn't understand what was going on, but she thought that if they both felt like Time was of the essence then Underland must be attempting to warn them of something. But what? "I've felt it too," she finally admitted to him. "It's what I meant in the ballroom."

"And I went and stormed out like a _slurvish _fool, thinking it had to be my doing," Tarrant slightly growled at himself unreasonably.

"You had no way of knowing," Alice stopped him before he could berate himself any further. "And I _was _thinking of you when I said it, only not in the way you thought." Her own feelings of confusion and unnameable fear began to crowd her mind. Without thinking twice, Alice threw her arms around Tarrant and buried her head into his chest. Something deep inside her wanted to hear his heart beating, needed to feel that he was still right there in front of her and that nothing had changed. "I wish I understood."

"Aye, me too," Tarrant said as he very nervously returned the hug. "But perhaps we should just do what Time wants us to and make the most of every moment. Maybe then he'll leave us alone."

Alice managed to look up at him, smiling a little as she remembered her previous thought about being Tarrant's sanity. Whether he knew it or not, she realized that he was just as capable of being her sanity when she needed it. "You're right," she said pulling away from the hug just enough to find his lips. This time the urgency they both felt lent itself to the kiss, making it so they never wanted to separate.

* * *

_There were hats everywhere. At least, they were the remnants of what used to be hats. They were shredded, ripped, torn, and any other term for mutilated Alice could think of. She could hear a horrible sound. It made her blood turn cold and she wanted nothing more than to cover her ears, but she couldn't move. The shriek sounded hauntingly familiar. "Tarrant," she finally whispered. _

_Of course. It was his hands that had done these horrible things to his lovely creations. She searched desperately for the remains of one hat in particular, but was relieved when she couldn't find it. "Tarrant, where are you?" She shouted, but there was no answer. _

_Suddenly, she felt a shadow fall over her and she looked up to see Tarrant towering above her. Alice took a closer look at her surroundings now and realized she was standing at the bottom of his over turned top hat. She shouted his name again, but he either couldn't hear her or was ignoring her. She watched in panic as he drank something mysterious from a vial. "Don't!" she warned him, but it was too late. The liquid had passed his lips and the vial fell from his hands. There was a thunderous crash as it hit the floor somewhere nearby and the entire top hat shook for a few brief seconds causing Alice to fall. _

_Alice focused on the Hatter in slight confusion. His appearance hadn't changed and yet she felt cold and alone, almost as if she didn't even recognize him anymore. She watched as he reached down to pick up the top hat, but he stopped just before he was able to touch it. Then, a terrifying expression came over Tarrant's face like Alice had never seen before. It was much more intimidating, more heinous than any fit of madness she'd ever witnessed. She shut her eyes tight as pain wrenched through her like the claws of a Bandersnatch._

_When she opened them again, the expression on his face had changed once more. The only word for it was: lifeless. He stood there for a few moments, staring down at her until she felt like she would drown in his gaze, before falling from her sight. The hat trembled again and Alice realized he had collapsed. "Tarrant!" she screamed with a voice she'd never heard escape her lips. It was terrified, broken, not at all the strong, brave, independent tone she normally used. Alice stood to her feet, desperation washing over her. She had to get to him! _

_It was only then that she truly understood that she was not her right-proper Alice size. She ran towards one of the inner walls of the hat and jumped, hoping to reach the brim. Her first attempt failed and she tried over and over again to no success. "You did this," she heard a voice that sounded like Mally's, although the dormouse was nowhere to be seen. "You did this to him!"_

_"No!" Alice exclaimed as she began to look for another way to get out of the hat. She noticed a hatpin lying amongst the shattered pieces of hats and decided she would brandish it as a sword. Picking it up, she turned towards the wall of the top hat with a look she had not worn since she'd stepped out to slay the Jabberwocky. She loved the top hat dearly, but now it was her mortal enemy. It was the only thing standing between her and Tarrant. _

_Alice charged towards the cloth of the hat with fury and proceeded to stab at it. However, no amount of slaying seemed to get her any closer to the outside. She stopped to assess how much further she had left only to see she hadn't dealt any damage to the hat at all. Fear tore at her and Alice dropped the hatpin in defeat. She couldn't do it. She literally felt completely incapable of going any further. She knew she would never reach Tarrant. _

_Then, a spine chilling voice belonging to someone she was sure she'd never heard before, filled the air around her so that Alice believed she might go deaf from the sheer awfulness of it. "You've lost your muchness." It taunted again and again before cruelly stating, "Your muchness is dead."_

_The sinister gravity of the statement made Alice scream Tarrant's name like she had never done before. "Tarrant! Tarrant! Tarrant!"_

"Tarrant!" This final scream was audible, though more of a gasp and not as loud as it had been in her nightmare, and sent Alice upward in her bed. She looked around her, astonished at how calm the world seemed to be. There was light streaming from the doors to her suite's private balcony and although it seemed from where she sat that the sky was overcast, it still wasn't as dark as the place she'd just been.

Alice tore back the sheets of her bed and stood to her feet. Her mind was flooded with four very startling images, images that her dream had painfully reminded her of. The horrid details of her nightmare might have been something conjured up by her own fearful imagination, but the four images she now recalled were very real. She knew she had seen them in the Oraculum the morning before. Alice had to find Mirana. She needed answers.

* * *

**For everyone who celebrates it, I hope your 4th of July weekend has been amazing! I know mine has been. I held off publishing this until today because I seem to have a yearly habit of publishing something on either July 3rd or 4th and didn't want to break tradition (and I was too busy to yesterday). So, Alice now remembers what she saw in the Oraculum. More answers to come in the next chapter for those who have been wondering about Mirana and all the uncertainty :)  
**


	5. The Things You Say

**Author's Note -** I just want to say how truly sorry I am for the wait. I've had this chapter written for at least a month now so that makes me feel even worse. Long story short, my life has been quite chaotic as of late (things like normal summer spontaneity, being sick, my darn wisdom teeth, trying to find a job, figuring out what to do about college, etc.) and any free time I've had has been spent over on LiveJournal. So, I really do apologize for not prioritizing this over LJ.

In this chapter, we finally get some answers to what Mirana did and why. Speaking of Mirana, I based her struggle with inner demons based on Anne Hathaway's comments on the character.

**Chapter 5  
**

_**The Things You Say  
**_

Mirana was in her throne room, discussing something with McTwisp when Alice entered unannounced and unconcerned with what was and wasn't royal protocol. She needed to see the White Queen and nothing was going to stop her. "Your majesty, may I please have a word?" Alice did her best to keep the sharpness from her tongue.

Mirana nodded and gestured her to join her. Her features betrayed that she was tired and distressed, but there was a smile on her face nonetheless. "I've been expecting you," Mirana said once Alice stood in front of the throne. "Nivens, would you see to it we're not disturbed?" She asked the White Rabbit politely and he hopped off immediately to fulfill her request. "Now, you're here because you remember aren't you," it wasn't really a question, but even so Mirana raised one of her eyebrows.

Alice nodded. "I just don't understand how I could have forgotten." There was a nearly tangible silence in the throne room as Mirana's hands seemed to twitch nervously and Alice racked her memory. "Wait, you made me forget," Alice found the memory she was looking for and shot the queen an accusative glance. "You said something, something Underlandian and then, I forgot. What did you say? Why did you say it?" Alice had never thought she would have a reason to doubt the White Queen, but it made no sense to her.

Mirana let her hands fall to her lap in defeat. She had wrestled all night in whether or not she had done the right thing and now she knew she had to concede the truth. "I want so much for everything to be perfect," she began with a sigh that spoke louder than her words had. Alice could see the inner struggle etched upon her face. "I'm afraid it's a family trait. Iracebeth used tyranny and disorder to create the life she wanted," Mirana rarely spoke of her sister and it was obvious it pained her to do so. "But I strive to use peace and order. I do want what's best for every one of my subjects, really I do," Mirana defended herself, "but it is never easy for me to find that balance between protecting my subjects and also protecting my own sanity."

Alice suddenly felt very sympathetic for the monarch. She realized how hard it must be for her to rule in the manner she did while constantly fighting the darkness that had consumed her sister. This also made Alice realize the queen must be very lonely without any family left. "I'm sorry, your majesty."

"No, I'm the one who is sorry," Mirana responded dutifully. She was the queen, and as such must be responsible for her mistakes. "When I saw you in pain yesterday after having shown you the Oraculum, a million thoughts filled my head. I felt like I had broken my vows because I had hurt you. The selfish part of me hated that I had chosen to ruin the planned celebration. This brought me back to feeling like a foolish ruler having ruined your happiness," Mirana tried to explain the complexity of her decision. "So, I chose to prolong your happiness and my own peace of mind by whispering a healing spell over you."

"A healing spell?" Alice scrunched her nose. "How is forgetting a type of healing?"

"It was a spell for a broken heart," Mirana answered. "Only a temporary one, mind you. That is how I knew you would eventually come to me for answers. I believe it even begun to wear off last night at the party," Mirana reminded Alice of the odd feelings she had experienced during the evening. "I shouldn't have done it and I truly am sorry. Can you ever forgive me?"

Alice took a moment to process everything, her mind settling on _broken heart _for an extended amount of time, before understanding how conflicted the White Queen must have been. "Of course," she answered, and finally Mirana's smile returned. "But I don't understand one thing. Last night, when Tarrant and I were strolling through the gardens, he said he had the same odd feelings I did. But he hasn't seen the Oraculum has he? Was he under a spell too?"

"No," Mirana answered as she stood to her feet. The smile had faded from her face again and Alice shuddered at the worry that replaced it. "Come with me." Mirana led her to a door that stood at one end of the throne room nearly hidden to anyone who was unaware of its presence She opened it to reveal a very lovely terrace. It was private, hedged all about excepting another very discreet door. "When I need a quick escape from the halls of Marmoreal," Mirana answered the question that Alice had not yet asked. It seemed as though the White Queen was full of secrets.

Alice's attention then turned upward. "Why is the sky so dark?" She had thought it had looked overcast before, but she hadn't realized it was as bad as it was. It had not been this dark the previous two days she'd been in Underland.

"It's as I began to fear last night," Mirana confessed as they both stared at the sky with growing dread. "I felt the heaviness growing. I don't have time to adequately explain, but I can sense darkness." She knew it was another family trait, but did not feel like an explanation was important at the moment. "Mally felt it too, I believe. And now you say Tarrant did."

"Why is this all happening?" More than ever, more than her previous trip, Alice wished she could really be dreaming. If only it was a dream, she could wake up and Hatter would be safe. Underland would be right again.

"Fate is weighing heavy on Underland's shoulders." Mirana dropped her gaze back down, not able to stare into the growing darkness any longer for many reasons which she kept to herself. "I believe Underland doesn't want to lose Tarrant anymore than you or I do."

"Then why doesn't Underland do something about it!" Alice raised her voice again. "Why did it ever allow this to happen in the first place?"

"Underland cannot govern, Alice, only react to the way it is governed." Mirana opened the door and they returned back into the throne room. "And, remember, we don't know how serious the things we've seen are yet."

"But the darkness, the feeling of Time running out, aren't those all indications?" Alice was trying to remain as calm as the White Queen, but it was difficult to say the least.

Mirana very simply nodded. There could be no denying that it seemed more and more likely they _hadn't_ misinterpreted the Oraculum. She looked at the Champion, who was not looking very much at all like a Champion at the moment, and felt a maternal instinct arise in her. "Sometimes a full stomach can help one think more clearly. Just because things are difficult, doesn't mean you should ignore your own well being." Mirana forced herself to smile and then led Alice towards the dining hall.

* * *

She had looked stunning in the gown he had made her. The image was permanently burned into his memory. Now, all Tarrant could think about was making more dresses for her. So, he had gone straight to work, every fabric somehow reminding him of Alice, creativity burning within him.

Tarrant cranked the arm of the sewing machine, a very remedial task, but also a dangerous one. It was always in these moments that demanded little of his attention that Tarrant's mind began to wander. It wandered to places it didn't belong. It wandered into the dark places where his madness was banished, but never dead; instead, it was always there waiting for a chance to break free and overthrow his sanity completely. His mind wandered into the places where Alice would not want him to be.

_Alice._

Tarrant began turning the crank of the sewing machine more furiously, remembering the project was for Alice. He needed to remain sane for her sake. She would look beautiful in another one of his creations, he tried to reason. She would be happy to know he was able to work at his trade again without faltering. She would respect him. Without his trade, what was he? What could he ever be for her? She had said he was good enough for royal court and good enough for her. If he was no longer good enough for royal court, did she also mean he would no longer be good enough for her?

_Were you ever good enough for her? _The madness seized its opportunity and began to hiss sinisterly. _You're just the last remaining member of the Hightopp Clan and a poor sample at that. Better Hightopps died that day. You got lucky. She deserves better than a Hatter, especially better than a mad one. _

Tarrant stopped working, a hazy cloud falling over his eyes as they changed shades. Suddenly, he felt as though he were in a box, a horribly crowded box, being assaulted from all sides. _You're mad. Just think of what you do to your hats and other things when you get angry. How much longer before it's Alice? You could hurt her. No, you could _kill_ her. _

"No, no, I could never hurt Alice. Never," Tarrant held his hands to his ears, wishing it would block out the noise. But it was no use. The voices were inside him. Always inside him and there was never going to be a way for him to escape them.

_Of course you could hurt her! You would never ever know until it was too late. _The madness continued to strangle him. _She's afraid of you. She'll never stay. You're one fit away from losing her forever. She doesn't mean it when she says you're wonderfully mad. She's afraid of telling you otherwise. _

"No!" Tarrant growled at himself, his eyes ablaze with fury, but not for the usual reason. Instead he was mad _at _his madness."Ah will nae be callin' Alice a liar." He shook his head until the voices were forced to settle and the color of his eyes lightened. "Alice?" There was a frightened tone that accompanied his very pronounced lisp. He looked around the work room and realized he needed to get out of there before the madness had a chance to return.

More than that, he needed to see Alice. He needed to see the strength in her eyes or the reassurance in her smile. He needed to prove to his madness it was wrong. Alice was still there, she was still safe, and she believed in him, madness and all. Yes, Tarrant needed to see Alice.

* * *

Mirana stared in wide eyed disbelief as Alice recounted the frightful images of her nightmare. It didn't seem possible to the White Queen that something that was meant for healing could have such a negative effect. Then again, she had also come to terms with the fact that she had made the wrong decision in administering the healing spell. Thus, from that point on, Mirana determined to restudy the spell for a broken heart thoroughly and restrain from using it in haste. "My dear, I would have never caused you to forget if I knew remembering would be so painful," Mirana spoke morosely as though her own heart felt the pain that Alice's did in reliving the vivid images that had haunted her the night before.

"You did what you thought was best," Alice responded graciously. She wanted the queen to know she didn't hold any ill will towards her, and never could she, for the outcome of the spell. "And if I'm being honest, a part of me is grateful for how everything unfolded." Alice had been giving it a lot of thought since she and the White Queen had sat down for a private meal, proving the queen had been right about thinking more clearly on a full stomach. She saw the curious expression on Mirana's face and continued, "I enjoyed the evening for all of its twists and turns. I feel as though it brought me closer to Tarrant, even if that only means it will be harder to part with him."

"We should perhaps restrain from using such phrases," Mirana politely pointed out. "We still can't be sure." She would remain ever hopeful in the face of doubt. If not only for the fact it was her nature to do so, but also for the sake of her subjects.

"I agree," Alice nodded, before taking a sip of tea and then setting her cup back down determinedly. "But I'm leaving." There, she had said what was on her mind at last.

"Leaving?" Mirana furrowed her brow, trying her best to decipher the meaning –besides the most blatantly obvious one– behind Alice's comment. "I know this must be a heavy burden to bear, even for a Champion, but running away…" Mirana started, but seeing the look in Alice's eyes let her sentence trail.

"I'm not running away," Alice answered proudly, although she understood how the White Queen could have made the assumption. "I would stay with Tarrant until the end, if that is his fate. I _want _to stay," she paused, realizing it was the first time she had allowed herself to openly admit her desire to stay in Underland. She briefly wondered if deep inside she'd always been denying it, if maybe she should have stayed the first, well second, time. Maybe then none of this would have happened the way it had. "But I see no other hope for him," she finally relented.

Mirana studied the defeated expression Alice wore as though she were trying to solve a great riddle. "I'm afraid I don't understand." She may be counted wise, but she didn't claim to know everything and Mirana was at a loss for the reasoning behind Alice's decision to leave.

"My nightmare was with purpose," Alice started, again slightly grateful despite the terrifying nature of it. "I think the first image of Tarrant in the Oraculum has already been fulfilled. His fit of rage yesterday in the work room," she pointed out.

"I can't deny I've had the same thoughts," Mirana nodded a little before allowing Alice to continue.

"But, you see, he wouldn't have even been there if it weren't for me. He was making the dress for me and nothing else would have prompted him to return to that place. I can't stop thinking about what Mallymkun said last night at the party. She said things have been worse since I've been back," Alice had not been able to really process the words in her pursuit of Tarrant at the time, but since had painfully mulled over them in silence.

"Mally spoke out of turn and in exaggeration," Mirana tried to assure her. "She was sorry for her words after you left."

"But I think she was right in saying them," Alice hated to admit it, but the facts of the matter assaulted her until she couldn't do anything else. "It's my fault! _I'm_ the reason Tarrant is in danger. I see no other explanation. I return and suddenly things take a turn for the worse. That's even how it appears in the Oraculum, isn't it?" It was a rhetorical question to which Alice already knew the answer. "Maybe this was all to show me my place isn't in Underland." If that be the case, it was a bitter lesson. "I have to leave or everything else will happen."

At last Mirana understood. But, for all her trust in Alice's judgment and respect for the Champion, she couldn't agree with her on this point. "It might still happen. Remember my warning about trying to change the Oraculum?" Alice did remember and her silence proved so. "I know you are trying to save him, but it is not muchness but madness that drives your decision," Mirana no longer spoke meekly since the two were alone and the topic called for more urgency.

"Maybe it is madness," Alice couldn't deny that. "But I'm afraid to stay." Neither of the two women saw the glimpse of orange that had quietly peaked into the room at that very moment, nor were they given the chance to as it disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. "Maybe my fear of staying is the same as running away, but I promise it's only because I'd rather lose him this way than watch him lose himself because of me." Absolem had once told her tears didn't solve anything, but Alice couldn't keep them from welling up in her eyes.

Mirana did not begrudge tears the same way the blue caterpillar might and she pitied Alice even more greatly if that were possible. However, she wanted her to see reason. "Alice, don't make a hasty decision as I did. For all either of us know, your leaving Underland could be the catalyst that causes things to worsen even if you hope for the opposite." Alice quickly dried the tears that had formed as they now ceased to flow. She pondered the White Queen's words and realized she hadn't considered that possibility. Alice was even more confused than before, feeling trapped at a crossroads with Tarrant's doom glaring at her from both directions. Mirana perceived her confusion. "This is why Absolem was always the best keeper of the Oraculum. It's why I dread ever looking at it. Even small glimpses of the future hardly seem worth the burden. Sometimes it seems wiser to let History create itself in obliviousness than to try to perceive its destined paths." Mirana had been staring blankly as she waxed philosophically, but her eyes re-focused on the new expression that had taken to Alice's face. "What is it?"

"The Oraculum! You've seen it and I've seen it," Alice started, an epiphany dancing around in her head.

"And Nivens," Mirana added.

"But not Tarrant!" Alice exclaimed causing the White Queen to sit back a little further in her chair. "We must show the scroll to Tarrant! He will be able to see his fate and maybe control it. He can make a new path," Alice said hopefully, ebullient to have a new idea that didn't involve leaving. "There is less uncertainty in it than my staying in Underland and watching it happen and even less uncertainty than if I leave." The more Alice thought about her idea to leave, the more she realized she would have been haunted with uncertainty every day she was gone from Underland. There would have been _no _forgetting, not deep inside of her.

Mirana carefully debated Alice's plan. She had not dared to show the Oraculum to Tarrant previously for two reasons. One, he would have immediately seen Alice's image and there would have been no telling how he would react. Two, upon seeing the predictions of his own life, there would have been no telling how he would react. However, Alice was now already returned so the former reason no longer mattered and the second may not be as difficult to forbear with Alice at his side. "We may not be able to change it in this manner either," Mirana started hesitantly before making her decision. "But it is not my place to withhold glimpses of Tarrant's future from him." Alice smiled gratefully and hoped to find Tarrant as soon as possible.

* * *

**I hope it was at least a little bit worth the wait. I realize it's not much of an eventful chapter. The next chapter definitely shouldn't take as long! *fingers crossed* Thanks for the patience :)**


	6. You Said We Wouldn't Make It

**Author's Note -** I want to say a collective thank you for all of the lovely reviews of the last chapter. Because I've been busy, I didn't quite manage to reply to all of them, but they all did make me smile :) In this chapter, I take _great_ liberties with Thackery as a character. I hope that's okay with everyone!

**Chapter 6  
**

_**You Said We Wouldn't Make It  
**_

_Maybe it is madness. But I'm afraid to stay. _Alice's words echoed over and over again as Tarrant ran from the palace and towards the woods, not really sure where he would eventually stop so long as he could escape the pressure building up from deep within him. As he ran, Tarrant tried his hardest not to assume the worst of Alice's comment, but it was no easy task. The word _madness _screeched in his ears until he could only make sense of it as being that Alice meant madness was her reason for leaving.

_And of course she means _your_ madness_. Tarrant came to a stop as he fell to his knees in anguish. His madness couldn't be right, the sane part of him argued. His madness was never right. Yet, it did seem highly likely she could mean nobody else. Had he really gone and finally scared her off? Had she come to her senses and realized she didn't want him or his madness? Because of his madness?

_I told you this would happen. It's just a good thing you didn't charge in there and hurt her. _Since when did his madness care who or what it hurt, Tarrant wondered. Then again, perhaps even his madness felt strongly for Alice. "I'm never going to hurt her!" Tarrant howled to no one. "If she leaves it's her choice." He had let her go once and he could do it again if that's what she wanted, he determined.

Then, the reality of what he had just said struck him. If Alice were to leave again, he would be lost. He already felt lost, but losing her again would be the final blow. He was certain of it. He knew he would fall into darkness and never be able to find a way out. Was this the cruel joke Time had been, not playing, but trying to warn him of? Was he to have her so close, closer than ever before, only to have to say goodbye to her? Was that the very dark end Time was ticking ever closer towards?

Why couldn't he just be sane, he bemused. What had he ever done to deserve his madness? He had rescued the White Queen, but was it a curse for not saving his family instead? He grabbed his hat and threw it onto the ground as if trying to free himself from a sudden weight it had been on his head. "Why can't I be normal?" If he was normal, he thought, then, Alice would have no need to be afraid of him. They could remain as happy as the moment she'd returned to Underland and there would be no odd feelings of Time running out on them or anything else. He could love her with a full mind, the way she deserved. "Why can't I just be normal?" he asked again, never expecting a response as he thought he was all alone.

"We've all wondered that from time to time, about you specifically I mean," Chessur's voice startled Tarrant and provoked the madness already torturous inside him. Before the Chesire Cat had a chance to blink, Tarrant had turned to see him –eyes frighteningly orange– and was on his feet and moving towards him unchallenged. Outlandish words of a most unkind nature were hurled at the panicked feline as Chessur moved backwards from the mad man, his mind so muddled from the happening he couldn't even think to evaporate to safety. "Tarrant?" He said, his ears flattening to his head in fear when it didn't change things. "Hatter!" he mimicked the more forceful approach Mally used. Still Tarrant came at him until Chessur found himself against a tree. He finally regained his senses and was about to evaporate when another name came to his lips and he uttered it in a futile hope to shake Tarrant of his madness. "Alice!"

Surprisingly, or not so surprisingly, Tarrant returned to himself and stopped in his tracks. He looked at Chessur with a pained face before sharply turning his back on him. It had been just another episode that seemed to prove to Tarrant he would never be normal as he wished. Not sure what else there was left to do, Tarrant's mind was filled with unspeakable thoughts. If he was doomed to always be half a man without Alice near and not have even his trade left to comfort him, Tarrant didn't know if he could handle it. He wondered if he should just wander into the Outlands and let his madness take him forever. At least there he wouldn't be able to hurt anyone but himself.

"What's the matter, old friend?" Chessur hadn't called Tarrant friend in ages, but the cat could tell something worse was amiss with the Hatter, and all of Underland for that matter, than had ever been before. In part, it had been why he had taken to following him after he'd noticed his flight from Marmoreal. Now, he put past grudges aside and hoped Tarrant would too at least long enough for an explanation to be had.

Tarrant didn't answer at first. He wanted to, but it was difficult when his madness held Chessur to blame for the Horunvendush Day. "What do you care?" He finally shrugged.

"I care about Alice you churlish moron," Chessur snapped at him, losing what little patience he had been striving to maintain. "The poor girl is probably out of her mind wondering where you are."

Tarrant turned back towards Chessur in another flash of anger. "Don't you dare ever call Alice out of her mind again!" However, it passed quickly this time as Tarrant's thoughts were reminded of what had caused him to flee in the first place. "And she wouldn't worry too much. She's leaving."

"What?" Chess looked at him with newly widened eyes. "Leaving? When? I don't believe it."

"I don't know when, but she will," Tarrant was annoyed that Chessur didn't believe him and he began to burr. "Ah 'eard 'er say she's a fearin' to stay an' she said somethin' abou' madness so she must be meanin' me."

"Oh, right, of course because it's always about you," Chessur rolled his eyes, his own annoyance growing. "I still don't believe it." The Chesire Cat remembered his conversation with Alice the night before and was doubtful that things could have changed so quickly. It was the other part of why he had followed after Tarrant. Chessur realized there could be no dissuading Alice of her feelings for the Hatter, but he could manage to make sure Tarrant didn't do anything stupid, something that would hurt Alice or make the match even more ill suited than the cat already thought it.

"And what other madness would she be talking about then, Chess? Can you answer me that?" Tarrant had Chessur stumped as the cat remained silent. "I'm pushing her away. And soon I'm going to lose her. I don't want to lose her, Chess," Tarrant admitted, causing the feline to feel a twinge of sympathy for him. "If I could just be normal, if I could just shake the madness, I…" he didn't finish. There seemed no point in it.

Chessur narrowed his eyes a moment before his characteristic grin spread across his face. "Well, is this Underland or is it Underland?" Tarrant looked at him in confusion as though it were a trick question. Just like Chessur to start asking riddles at a time like this, he thought. "I'm pretty sure there's a potion for anything so why not madness too? Find it, take it, _make Alice happy_," Chessur stressed the last part in a protective manner. It seemed a fail proof enough plan to the Chesire Cat and he couldn't deny there was a _slurvish _motive of his own in the suggestion. If Tarrant was sane again, not only could the Hatter and Alice have peace, but he could have peace. Maybe they would even be friends again, the possibility occurred to him.

"Chessur, you're brilliant!" The idea seemed fail proof to Tarrant as well and he looked at the cat with a giddy gleam in his eyes – much to Chessur's distaste. Perhaps being friends again wouldn't be so simply accomplished, Chess rethought. "I must say, it's your best idea since you helped me escape Salazen Grum." However, this new joy didn't go unchecked. Tarrant furrowed his eyebrows as he gave it some thought. "I don't know how to even find the potion if it should exist."

"Well, there's Thackery I suppose. He might know. Or perhaps the White Queen," Chessur suggested. "Then again, maybe you should just go talk to Alice before you do anything." He was beginning to lose faith in the idea. Something in the pit of his stomach warned him against it.

"I can't risk frightening Alice any further. Being who she is, she'd leave before I had a chance to risk it," Tarrant explained, although he meant nothing mean against Alice's character. Wait, would it be risky, he suddenly wondered, but shook the thought from his head. "And the White Queen might be just as against it."

"But I wouldn't suggest doing anything against her majesty's counsel," Chessur warned again. However, Tarrant didn't seem to be listening as he began trudging back towards Marmoreal. Chess sighed and shrugged his shoulders before dissipating into a bluish-gray mist. If Tarrant wanted to do things his way, he could only do so much to persuade him otherwise. Besides, the chances of his finding a potion without Mirana's help seemed slim anyways, Chessur figured.

* * *

Tarrant felt a little like the sneaky Chesire Cat as he crept about Marmoreal in an attempt not to be interrupted before he was able to complete his mission. There were moments he felt guilty and wanted nothing more than to go turn himself in to Alice or the White Queen, but he kept telling himself it was for Alice he had to do what he did. He had to try to find a cure for his madness. It was the only solution left, he reasoned.

At last, Tarrant came stealthily into the kitchens of the white palace. He was grateful that no one else ever disturbed the March Hare as he fiddled about here and there making wonderful feasts of whatever sort fancied him. "So ye thought ah woul' nae catch ye in yer lies?" The hare shouted at a large spoon before casting it towards Tarrant and adding angrily, "There ye can 'ave him then if that's wha' ye want!" Tarrant ducked the object hurdled at him and smiled a little at his friend's amusing manner. Ironically, Thackery's madness never seemed to bother Tarrant in the way his own did. Thackery's seemed perfectly suited to him. If Alice's "terribly, delightfully, wonderfully, perfectly" definition of madness suited anyone it would be the March Hare and not himself, Tarrant thought.

"Where does her majesty keep the potion books?" Tarrant asked straightway as though there was nothing unusual in his question.

Thackery continued with what he was doing and it would seem to anyone else that he had not even heard the inquisition, but Tarrant knew that was just his dear old friend's way of doing things. He was definitely processing the question somewhere in his mind, or what was left of it, and would eventually answer. The only uncertainty was how he would answer. Would it be helpful or simply nonsensical?

"O'er there on the shelf," Thackery answered plainly enough, but it was followed by the hare taking a ladle of whatever concoction he was working on and flinging it in the direction of the shelf he meant.

"Ah, thank you," Tarrant nodded gratefully before heading over to the shelf and taking one of the volumes to look over. Flipping through the pages of the first volume, he found nothing. Not ready to give up, Tarrant combed over the next volume. Again, he didn't see anything useful. Growing more anxious, as he was already impatient and perplexed to say the least, he grabbed the next book and began searching the many potions it contained in an even more frantic manner. He was close to the end of this volume as well, losing hope with every page and, thus, losing the determination he'd had at the start of his quest. Then, suddenly, his eyes caught the word _madness _and his heart nearly stopped.

His eyes quickly scanned the informative text. _In the case of unwanted madness, mix potion and consume one vial's worth at once. Potion will take effect immediately and become permanent should reversal potion not be taken before the final stroke of the third day. Side effects may include…_

Tarrant didn't finish as he saw the very long list of side effects. They were probably only minor details, he figured. After all, it stood to reason that healing potions couldn't do more harm than damage. His eyes skipped ahead to the list of ingredients, but this is where his heart sank. He was a Hatter not a Healer. Only those gifted in the healing arts, like the White Queen, could successfully create any potion. It was how she had known that the Jabberwocky blood would grant anything Alice wished, and why she had been the one to extract it first. However, Tarrant wasn't in the mood to think of that blasted purple substance at the moment. He needed to find a way to create the potion.

"Ah said ye are too thick fer yer own good!" Thackery banged on the side of his pot with the ladle, bringing Tarrant's full attention on him. Spinning around quickly, Tarrant watched as the March Hare poured a large pitcher of liquid into the pot and began stirring wildly and shouting threatening words to make the density of the food substance (soup or whatever else it might be) comply with his demands.

"Thackery!" The sound of his name did not break the March Hare from his madness like it did Tarrant. Instead, it made the poor creature jump clean into the air, clutching the ladle closely to him in anxiety as he did. "So sorry," Tarrant realized his mistake and quickly apologized. He had simply been in a state of ecstasy as the thought occurred to him that Thackery was also gifted in the healing arts. Now it struck him why Chessur had mentioned the hare. Thackery had been able to create and administer potions with ease before the madness had taken him at the Horunvendush Day. Perhaps he still could if Tarrant asked him. After all, he was still clever in the kitchen and, in his short-lived moments of clarity, he knew exactly the precise course of action which should be taken – both sure signs to Tarrant that his friend still possessed somewhere in him the gifts and knowledge he had once used freely.

Upon reaching the floor again and realizing it had been Tarrant to startle him, Thackery chuckled insanely as he grabbed and pulled at an ear with his free paw and pointed at Tarrant with the ladle in his other. "Is it tea time?" His expression and train of thought changed quickly.

"Not yet, no," Tarrant answered first before gathering the nerve to ask his own question. "I need to ask you a favor." Thackery began twitching nervously, clearly uncomfortable with the prospect. "I need you to make a potion for me."

"Wha' kind o' potion?" The March Hare's eyes widened. He was intrigued by the prospect.

"This one," Tarrant held out the book and showed Thackery the potion he meant. "It's very important. I need it as soon as possible."

"Aye, well, Ah've got stew a boilin' so Ah s'pose," Thackery paused. He studied the page more closely than he had before, scratching at one of his ears thoughtfully. Tarrant began to worry he would be against the idea. "Aye, Ah think we've got all the ingredients we need," the hare nodded as Tarrant's worry gave way to relief.

Tarrant felt the pace of his heartbeat quicken as he watched Thackery working away at adding ingredients of a magical, strange and, in some cases, even hideous nature into a large pot. At last, the March Hare spit into the potion to add the healing touch needed to make it work properly. He then grabbed a vial and, not so carefully, filled it. Corking the top, he handed it to Tarrant.

"Thank you," Tarrant took it and clung to it joyfully. He needed only now to take it and then evaluate whether or not it worked. Of course, he didn't see how it couldn't work if it was a healing potion. He thanked his friend again before hurrying from the kitchen, leaving Thackery behind in a state of slight confusion. That, however, passed quickly as the March Hare chuckled uncontrollably for a moment and then went back to cooking as if nothing had happened.

* * *

**So, as you can see, I decided to make it so that Thackery is gifted in the healing arts like Mirana is (as is stated in the script, err, and I think book too maybe? Can't recall.) And I don't know why, but I decided to make it so that the spitting part is tacked on by the healer to add the power, lol. So, whether or not it's believable, hope everyone's okay with the backstory I created for him. And there was no fooling the lot of you :) You all were spot on when you assumed poor Tarrant couldn't take Alice's comment well...  
**


	7. And I Never Looked Back

**Chapter 7  
**

_**And I Never Looked Back**_

Alice was growing frustrated and more than just a little bit worried. She had searched all the places where Mirana suggested Tarrant might be and had yet to find him. She was about to check the kitchens when a pair of large cat eyes appeared in front of her, followed by a large grin. "Chess!" Alice exclaimed, happy to see him. "Have you seen Tarrant?" She assumed chances would be better for him to have seen Tarrant since he could go anywhere he pleased much quicker.

"I told him you'd be worried out of your…" Chessur stopped, recalling Tarrant's angry reaction to the phrase. Now that he thought about it, he realized he didn't really want to insinuate that Alice was mad. Underland was mad enough without its Champion being mad too. "I told him you'd be worried to find him.

"So you've seen him then?" Alice looked hopefully as the rest of the Chesire Cat materialized.

"Earlier," Chessur nodded. "He was off his head about you leaving."

"Wait, what did he say?" Alice couldn't believe her ears.

"He was convinced you were leaving Underland." Chessur answered lazily. "He said something about hearing you say his madness was driving you away," he didn't bother remembering word for word what Tarrant had said as he assumed it didn't make much of a difference.

"Why would he think that?" Alice furrowed her eyebrows. At first, she wondered if somehow he'd heard her foolish plan to leave Underland. But that didn't seem to make sense seeing as she'd been alone with Mirana, as far as she had noticed, when she'd said it. And she had certainly never said his madness was driving her away. Finally, Alice came to the conclusion that Tarrant must have been having irrational thoughts about not deserving her like he had the night before. "Now I really need to find him."

"Have I missed something?" As much as Chessur didn't care to concern himself with whys or hows or what fors, he did like to at least know what was going on. He prided himself with being one step ahead of everyone else, even if that wasn't always the case, because of his ability to be here or there nearly as quick as a breeze. "Why the sudden urgency to find Tarrant?"

Alice realized there was no point in trying to hide the truth from Chessur. If he knew the dire circumstances, she was certain he would be more eager to aid her. "Tarrant may be in danger. The Oraculum predicts something awful."

"How awful?" Chessur didn't have any reason to doubt her, but he was a feline and, therefore, curious how bad it could actually be.

"I don't know," Alice answered honestly. "I only know I have to find him and show him his future so he can try to stop it from happening or else he could…" she didn't finish and Chessur's eyes widened in comprehension of what she meant. "You have to help me find him. I only hope he hasn't drunk anything odd lately," she said before opening the door to the kitchens. Chessur was pondering her words deeply as she got Thackery's attention. "Thackery, have you seen Tarrant?"

"Aye, he was in 'ere a li'l while ago. Now get outta 'ere 'fore ye scare the veg'tables," Thackery threatened.

"Well, he must be in the castle somewhere then," Alice said as she turned to look at the Chesire Cat. However, he was nowhere to be seen. "Chess? Thackery, have I gone mad or does everyone keep," Alice turned back to look at the March Hare, but he too had skittered off to find another ingredient for his stew, "vanishing?" Alice gave an aggravated groan before returning to her search for Tarrant.

As for Chessur, he had vanished in order to find Tarrant as quickly as possible. He had finally processed what Alice might have meant by the Hatter drinking something odd and then upon hearing Thackery say Tarrant had already been in the kitchen, knew it meant things might be more urgent than Alice even realized. "Tarrant!" Chess found the Hatter in his personal chamber. He wondered why Alice hadn't thought to check for him there, but he didn't give it much deliberation beyond that.

Tarrant had been holding the vial in his hand and nearly dropped it at the unexpected sound of Chessur's voice. "What are you doing here?" Tarrant turned angrily. He had already been in a discomforting state of mind without the interruption of the Chesire Cat. He had been feeling guilty for even considering doing anything without the consent of Alice or the White Queen. Knowing he was doing it to keep Alice by his side made him feel _slurvish. _

"Whatever you do, don't drink it," Chessur didn't waste time with an answer to his question.

"And why shouldn't I?" Tarrant narrowed his eyes at him. "It was your idea after all."

"Don't remind me." The last thing Chessur wanted was a deceased Hatter on his conscience, which despite what Tarrant might think did exist. "Alice said…"

"So you've gone and told Alice you, you…" Tarrant's eyes grew orange as he looked at the cat, wondering why he'd ever trusted him in the first place. Instead of hurling the usual insults, Tarrant defied Chessur's warning and opened the vial.

"Tarrant, listen to me. I didn't tell Alice anything! You have to trust me!" Chessur's ears were flattened to his head as he pleaded for him to see reason. He moved to grab the vial from Tarrant's hands, but it was too late.

In one quick gulp, the contents of the vial disappeared down Tarrant's throat and the vial dropped from his hand as he jerked violently. The room reeled and Tarrant moved backwards to his bed, falling on it for support. The last thing he saw, or at least thought he saw, was Chessur fleeing from the scene in a wisp of cloud. _Coward_, he thought as he fell back onto his bed entirely and his eyes closed.

* * *

_Tarrant couldn't figure out if he was flying or falling. It was the oddest sensation he'd ever felt. He was certain he was moving upward, yet the feeling in the pit of his stomach was like when one falls. It seemed to last forever until finally he was blinded by an excruciatingly bright light and shot through a large hole and onto the ground somewhere. Gathering himself, Tarrant looked around and quickly realized he wasn't in Underland. The colors were dull to say the least. There was a fog that swirled all about him, thicker than he'd ever seen. Not knowing what else to do, Tarrant walked in no particular direction. _

_Through the fog he thought he saw shapes, but he couldn't be sure at first. It wasn't until he caught sight of two eyes as big as saucers that he became encouraged that he wasn't alone. "Chess, is that you?" Tarrant asked, but to his disbelief a large, frightening frown appeared in place of the Chesire Cat's usual grin. _

_Taken off guard, Tarrant moved backwards, but bumped into two sickly looking figures in stripes, both girls if his eyes hadn't fooled him. Yet, they appeared very much like twisted versions of the Tweedles. Moving again through the fog he heard a lady shriek that she wanted red roses. Fearing the tone of voice that reminded him of the Red Queen, Tarrant's pace quickened and he searched for a way out of the fog._

_He suddenly realized he was in a maze. Every twist and turn through it brought him back to another misrepresented figure of those he knew best. At one turn he'd seen a woman who looked very much like Alice, only older. She wore a black dress, although fashioned exactly as Mirana's white gown, and she had a blank stare that made Tarrant's blood run cold. _

_As he continued running frantically, he feared he would turn a corner and see a horrible version of his dear Alice. However, before he could, he suddenly reached the exit and was in a clearing, fog still swirling all about. In the distance, there was a mirror. Tarrant hated mirrors, as he hated his own reflection, but he felt drawn towards this one. _

_Walking slowly, each footstep pounding loudly against the ground, Tarrant finally reached the mirror and looked into it. He expected to see himself, his hideously mad self, but at first there was nothing. Then, another form appeared in the mirror. It was a man in a brown suit. His hair was red, but kept short and neat. His nose seemed to be turned up in a pompous fashion. Then, to Tarrant's horror, the image mirrored his movements. "That can't be me!" Tarrant tried to step back from the mirror, but his reflection only copied his action and moved backwards in the mirror. _

_All at once there was the loud dong of a clock. It shook the earth beneath his feet and caused the mirror in front of him to crack until at last the glass shattered completely. Broken from the spell the mirror had seemed to have over him, Tarrant turned to see the largest clock he'd ever laid eyes on, towering high above him in the distance. It continued to dong, having reached the twelve o'clock hour. _

_That's when Tarrant saw Alice. She stood on the edge of the clock tower, attempting to steady herself from the shaking brought on by the thunderous chimes. "It's too late!" he heard her cry out, her voice sending shivers through him as it sounded nothing like the Alice he knew. At last, the clock reached its final dong, one more powerful than any of the others before it. The earth split open around Tarrant, but his eyes were fixated on the clock tower as Alice finally lost her footing and fell backwards._

_Down, down, down she fell. Or was he the one falling again? _

* * *

Tarrant opened his eyes and looked around. He was safe and sound in his room in Marmoreal. _What an infuriatingly mad dream_, he thought to himself as he sat up. Wondering what had even possessed him to have such an odd dream in the first place, Tarrant found his top hat, that had apparently fallen sometime when he was asleep, and returned it to his head. He then took out his pocket watch and gaped at the time. It was an hour until Brillig and he had been asleep?

Shaking his head in slight confusion, Tarrant stood to his feet and trekked to the milliner work room. Once there, he set straight to work on the dress he had been making for Alice. Smiling, he thought of how happy he was Alice had returned. She now cared for him the way he had cared for her the second time she'd come.

Curiously though, he suddenly couldn't recall the details of that visit. They were like fuzzy question marks that had no answer. In fact, as he stopped what he was doing for a moment and thought deeply about it, he found he couldn't recall much of anything save the past few days. And even that seemed to contain large holes here and there. He recalled Alice returning, dancing, strolling through the garden, an odd feeling of Time running out, and something about Alice saying she was afraid to stay. He had no recall of specific things said or done. He had no recollection of ever falling asleep. Actually, he felt as though he had just awoken from a very long dream of which he couldn't remember the details.

"What is the matter with me?" Tarrant pondered aloud to himself. Then, something struck him. The memory of Alice saying she was afraid to stay came to the forefront of his mind. Yet, he didn't remember anything else about what had prompted her to say such a thing. "That can't be right," he shook his head as he returned to working on the dress. Maybe he had misheard her. Perhaps he wasn't remembering something else important that would make sense of it.

The statement didn't make sense on its own after all. Why should Alice leave Underland now? So soon? He had assumed their feelings for one another would prompt her to stay forever this time. Unless she wanted to visit her home from time to time, he considered. Tarrant simply could not think of a reason which would prompt Alice to leave.

At last, he shrugged and put it out of his mind. There was no reason to let the thought bother him and interrupt his work. It would make more sense to just ask Alice for himself when he saw her at tea time. Then, there would be no room for misunderstanding, he reasoned.

* * *

There was a long table with a white cloth and white chairs surrounding it in Marmoreal's gardens. Thackery was busy setting it for tea, running in and out of the palace carrying at least five trays every time. Meanwhile, Alice and Mirana already sat at the table, early for tea time. Mally had also arrived early and was helping Thackery in whatever way she could.

"I just wish I knew where he's gone to," Alice said, worry etched on her face.

"Let's try not to panic, dear," Mirana tried to keep rational. "Perhaps you just kept missing him. You know how these things are. Whenever you need to find someone, it seems as though you can't and then they find you instead."

"I suppose…" Alice wasn't entirely sure if that made sense. Then again, nothing ever made sense in Underland so it probably was true.

"Tarrant never misses tea," Mirana smiled. "I'm sure he'll be here." Of course, the White Queen wasn't actually sure. She only hoped it would be so and decided to remain positive.

"What is all this fuss about Hatter?" Mally couldn't keep quiet since she could clearly hear their conversation. "Can't you leave him be for a little bit without worryin' your head off about it? You left him before, remember?"

"Yes, I do remember, Mallymkun and I don't need you to keep reminding me," Alice snapped. She disliked being short with people and felt bad for having lost her temper with the dormouse. However, she was in no mood for needless reproach.

"Mally, it _is _very important Tarrant be found as soon as possible," Mirana explained calmly to the dormouse, who had her sword raised in front of her and in Alice's direction threateningly. "And, Alice, I realize you're very upset at the moment, but…"

"You're right, your majesty," Alice said before the White Queen could finish. "I'm sorry, Mally. I really didn't mean to sound harsh. I'm just very worried."

"I'm sorry too," Mally sighed as she put her sword away. She then scurried closer to the two women. "Does this have to do with last night and how everything seemed topsy-turvy?"

Mirana nodded. "It's like you thought, Mally," she admitted. "Everything in Underland is not right. But it isn't Alice's doing." She looked at both Mally and Alice as she said this in order to make them both understand.

"Alice, I need to talk to you," Chessur suddenly appeared, taking them all off guard. He had been hiding out since what had happened with Tarrant, afraid of letting the others know. It had been his idea, after all, for Tarrant to take a potion for his madness. He had struggled back and forth, not wanting to be the coward Tarrant often accused him of being, yet not really having the courage to just come right out and admit what he'd done. However, he finally found his nerve and was ready to tell Alice the truth and do whatever he could to make amends for his foolish advice. "Tarrant has…"

"Hello, everyone," Tarrant appeared, a smile on his face as he was always happy to share tea with his Alice, his friends and, of course, his queen.

However, smiles were not shared amongst the other members of the small party, even if his joining them meant Alice would no longer need to search for him. Instead, as they all turned their attention towards him, there were gasps from Alice, Mally and Mirana and an "oh dear" from Chessur. Even Thackery dropped the new tray he was carrying and began quivering at the sight of his friend.

Alice stood to her feet and stepped backward from the table fearfully. She suddenly felt colder than she had ever felt before. "Tarrant, what have you done?"

* * *

**I make no excuses for why this took forever. I'm only sad that it did. And I hope that it doesn't take this long again, but with school time and writer's block, I can't promise :( But I do promise to try my best!  
**


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